Reindeer Paws
by Uncle Charlie
Summary: What do you get the most evil villain of all times for Christmas? Why, a warehouse of weapons, of course... But who are those guys being beaten up on? Written for the 12 Fics of Christmas 2019


"_Poo ka too_," Kevin whispered.

"Whaaaa?" Stuart asked, just slightly annoyed by the request.

"_Poo ka too_!" Kevin belatedly realized what he say. "_Poo ka un_."

Stuart snorted and focused his one eye on the door. It seemed like an hour since Dave, Tom and Kenny had entered the building. There has been some promising noise of destruction from inside but not much else. It annoyed him that they were in there having fun while they stood outside in the cold waiting.

"_Entrez badado_?" Bob asked. The white fake fur around the hood of his parka tickled his nose and he really wanted to be back at headquarters and in bed. He'd fallen in love with the thick red coat and pleaded with Agnes to let him borrow it.

Kevin scowled at him and shook his head. A week ago, Timmy and Donald has discovered this cache of weapons and there didn't seem to be anyone around to claim them. What better than steal the lot and give them to Gru for Christmas? It was easy, appropriate and cheap, three hallmarks of a bargain to Kevin's way of thinking.

"_Pwede na_?" Lester was starting to sound anxious and you didn't want a minion carrying a fart gun to be anxious in any way.

However, he was getting bored. He was a minion of action and decision. He sighed and gestured them forward. "_Eime_!"

It was dark inside the building, but they had Randolph. Lester grabbed the minion and bent him over sharply. Instantly, the minion began to glow an eerie yellow.

"_Bank ku."_

"_Tatata bala tu_."

They walked and argued until they were deep in the warehouse, twisting and turning down the box-lined passages until they came to a cleared area.

"All right, who sent you?"

Kevin held up a hand and everyone fell silent. They crowded around their designated leader and peered out. There were two chairs and men were tied to them and blind folded. Neither looked as if they were in any mood to talk even if they were the chatty sort. One sported a military haircut and Kevin smelled soldier even from this distance. The other man was shorter and heavier, not military, but he had a _look_ to him.

"I said, who sent you?" The speaker backhanded the taller man. "I know you didn't come here alone, Gibbs. Who sent you?" The three other men standing around focused their attention upon the pair. Four humans against three, relatively unarmed minions. Kevin didn't like those odds.

"I sent me," Gibbs said. His voice was strained.

"Perhaps the good doctor will be more willing to talk. I mean, it's amazing what a man will say to spare his fingers." The man held up a knife.

"No, leave him alone. He doesn't know anything." Gibbs shouted and the shorter man shifted.

"Don't worry, Jethro." He tried to sound brave, but there was a quaver to his voice.

"_Que esso_?" Stuart asked pushing to the front of the pack and Kevin shushed him. It was too late. They were heard and the knife-wielding man looked up. Gibbs also heard it and stiffened, his expression one of hope and concern.

"And what have we here, Gibbs? Reinforcements?"

"I doubt it," Gibbs said, relaxing. "No one knows we're here. Or cares."

"Shut up." The comment earned him another backhand and suddenly Bob didn't like what he was seeing. He knew what it was like to be picked on and bullied.

'"Hey," he shouted and a dozen eyes turned in his direction, including that of the human. "_Poo pa!_"

"_Corrida!_" Kevin shouted and they took off in a dozen directions. He turned the corner and plowed into Dave, Tom and Kenny. They were all carrying backpacks filled with weapons and Kevin grinned. Now it was their turn.

The fist-happy chap rounded the crate and looked around, obviously puzzled. Then his knee was tapped, he looked down and caught the blast from Stuart's fart gun full in the face. He looked surprised, then sickened, then he collapsed gasping for breath.

"_Mumangeni_," Kevin said to Tom. Tom was an expert at knots. He'd spent extra time at Edith's ninja Deathstar camp this summer.

Bob crept out from his hiding place and ran over to the captive. "_Bello_," he started to say.

"Freeze right there!" One of the humans had come around the corner and was aiming a gun at Bob. "I don't know what you are - beside dead." He pulled the trigger, except his weapon was frozen. In fact, he was frozen.

Kevin smiled and in his best Gru imitation, shouted, "Freeze ray!" He knocked the guy over with a karate chop and nodded to Bob. "_Pita_," he said and nodded to the captives.

Bob smiled and ran up to the shorter man, quickly untying his feet. Then he found a short box and climbed up onto it. It was just the right height and he undid the ropes around shorter man's hands.

Instantly the man reached for the blindfold and pulled it off. He blinked in the sudden change of lights and then started at the bright red blob before him.

Bob waved and rushed off to join his fellow minions. "_Kondwerani Khrisimasi_!"

"Duck! Duck, what's happening?" The still-blindfolded Gibbs struggled in his chair.

"I do believe we were just rescued by a very small Santa Claus. Hold still and I'll release you!"

Bob chuckled at that and then froze at the noise approaching. A hand grabbed him and he gasped, then smiled at Stuart. "_Eime_."

"Gibbs?

"Where are you, Gibbs?"

Bob followed Stuart away from the shouts and out into the night. He knew that his friends would be okay now. They ran a block to where they had parked Gru's car and headed home.

Kevin proudly surveyed his little troops. They had subdued some bad guy wanna-be's, rescued a couple good guys and gotten some great gifts for the boss. Best Christmas ever.

Poo kat oo - Keep your eyes open

Poo ka un - Keep your eye open.

Entrez badado = why don't we go in?

Pwede na – Can we go?

Eime – Let's go.

Bank ku – thank you

Tatata bala tu – I hate you

Que Esso – what is it?

Corrida – run

Poo Pa – poop head

Mumangeni – Tie him up

Pita – Go

Kondwerani Khrisimasi – Merry Christmas


End file.
